Many of us, no matter what level we are at in our lives or careers, feel resistance or a sense of being stuck towards specific tasks. We often mask this with many different terms, but the true problem that is often plaguing our workforce is avoidance and procrastination. I have seen time and time again, people with incredible talents, opportunities, processes, poised for success, but unable to get over a feeling of avoidance that they often cannot understand. Trapped in their own prison, often only because of a survival mechanism within our minds, attempting to keep us from some sort of pain or disappointment. This often causes even more psychological distress, as many times it is the things we want most that provide the most resistance.
If this goes unresolved, the brain pattern only gets more ingrained, and is often very difficult to climb out of, but this is mostly because we are not taught the way to dissolve this issue. Behavioral changes are only band aid solutions, they do not solve the root of the problem. Here is a clear solution that has worked time and time again.
Identify point of resistance, avoidance, procrastination
Achieve clarity on the physical symptoms
Dig for the root of where in time this issue began, search for fear
Energetically heal the issue at the original point in time
Have that version of yourself understand the truth of the situation
Learn a state change, a perfect symphony of brain chemicals and a relaxed state of the nervous system
Set a plan to accomplish the task
Now you are building a new internal program and blueprint that does not involve avoidance. There is a solution to this that is relatively simple. We are all dealing with the same human programming that often does not fit into our modern world, this is why we need to utilize these processes and techniques. It creates productivity, performance, and most importantly, freedom from mental pain and stress that eventually leads to physical issues. This causes a vicious cycle that leads people down self destructive paths.
Its important to remember that all of our problems can be dissolved, and that allows for unlimited potential. We just have to be willing to do the work, and that work is not always easy. Think of this process as mental fitness. Which has to be done daily. The workout does not always feel great in the moment, you’ll have to deal with some discomfort, but in the end we always feel and perform better.
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Causes of avoidance:
Recognize that avoidance is a basic human mental program whose root sits at the level of survival. Tip 1, if you’re avoiding, there is a level of a lack of perceived safety in the nervous system and subconscious.
Our brain learns avoidance due to circumstance, so all instances of avoidance are based in a moment in time where we learned something, felt some kind of pain whether physical or emotional. You touched a hot stove as a kid, now you avoid it. You got rejected at the school dance now you avoid talking to that new boy/girl, you were put down for accomplishing something as a kid and now you don't feel worthy and avoid certain actions that hinder performance.
If we can see that we are not alone in these situations then we can accept that there is nothing wrong with us. The avoidance is just a signal, it is our job to be aware of the signal, step 1.
But what no one else tells us, or maybe no one else knows, is how to actually remove the cause of the avoidance. We’re constantly forced to make behavioral changes. Do this, do that, just push through etc. but that leaves us exhausted, unhappy, and almost never successful. We must dissolve the issue where the problem started, at a moment in time. That has to be done on an energetic level, through emotion, not behavior. Once we do that, then we can implement behavioral changes.
If avoidance is a state in which our minds and nervous systems believe we “are not ok,” then we need to recreate an internal environment of being ok. This is often how we interact with the modern world in a completely skewed way. 99.99% of us are totally ok, we have everything we need at a basic level. If we can create this environment within, then we will not exhibit the behavior of avoidance to begin with. This can be done with specific state change techniques such as breathwork to reduce stress chemicals and heart rate. Heart rate coherence exercises to reduce stress and rhythmic irregularities, energy shifts to put our neurochemicals in an optimal state, and postural changes to reset the physical nervous system and provide the proper signals. This costs us nothing, and requires nothing out side of ourselves, nothing at all. These are the most powerful tools we have access to as humans.
This is training. It must be trained close to daily. We’re rewiring the composition of how our brains work, just as an athlete would physically train to change their body composition. Do you think you can build muscle and lose fat by working out once a year or once a month? Not successfully, but this is what most of us do with our mental state. By utilizing these techniques we are building the mental muscles for performance and we are burning and releasing the fat. The muscles are the practices that help us perform at 100% and give us resilience for tough times. The fat is all the negative patterns, programs, behaviors, and beliefs that we no longer need.
Now that we’ve trained changing our state we can then implement the behavioral changes. Scheduling, designing our day, keeping logs of accountability, reviewing our reasoning why, and overall setting ourselves up for success. But we can only do this if we are in an optimal position to do so, that means and internal environment, as that is all that we can control, and all that matters in this case of avoidance and fear.
This is where we can now become our own coaches and advisors, this is the point where we can gain the best awareness to continue growth back to our most natural and free state. Take note of your patterns as the day goes on. Take the responsibility to face what we dont want to face and be critical. Loving, but critical. Coach yourself like you would another, most of us never give ourselves the attention we need to thrive.
Do all of this, and you wont avoid the things that need to be done, the things that will greatly improve your life and the lives of those around you.